Why You Shouldn't PLAY Hard To Get - But BE Hard To Get

There are lots of people who are convinced that playing hard to get is the answer. Here’s a perspective flip! Instead of playing hard to get, why not be hard to get?

Because you’re busy with more important things to do than to play mind games, right? You’re working on being the woman you want to be and creating a life that you love. You have friends and family to have fun with. You make your decisions based on your core values and stick to your boundaries. You respect yourself and you won’t settle. Be the person who knows who they are, what they want, and isn’t afraid to go after it.

If you like someone, let them know! You already know the two possible outcomes. Either they say yes, or they say no. If they don’t have the same feelings for you, it doesn’t need to break you. Or if they do have the same feelings for you, and end up blocking themselves from what they really want on a subconscious level...again it doesn’t need to break you. Learn, evolve,  stay strong, and be understanding of their journey too. Rejection is part of life, don’t let it stop you from going after what you want.

“The extent to which you allow yourself to be seen is the extent to which you allow yourself to be loved.” ~ Vienna Pharoan

The courage to be vulnerable and authentic brings us face to face with the lessons that we need to learn to level up our consciousness. Yes, it feels risky and can give us anxiety. It’s a new you! An authentic version of yourself who is letting fear ride in the passenger seat on mute. Embrace this skin-crawling sensation. Most people know it as ‘growth’ which can be uncomfortable and scary! Do it scared. It gets easier, promise! 

I told the “Surfer Dude” I loved him, knowing there was a big chance it would scare him and we would end things. Guess what? We ended things. Do I have any regrets? Absolutely not! And that is the reason why you need to go for it. So you don’t have regrets.

If you act differently from who you really are, how can you possibly keep the impression up and actually be happy with yourself long term?! The farce you play out will become your truth and it’s a downward spiral from there, like a thriller-movie cover-up alibi gone rogue. If you do end up “winning” the guy because of your lies and mind games, you have to get real with yourself and ask, what kind of guy are you attracting? A guy who only wants a woman he can’t have? You will be desirable to him for a hot minute. But when the thrill of the chase is over, you’re left reeling from what you thought was love. Love is also a verb which means showing up in the relationship.

“Staying vulnerable is a risk we have to take if we want to experience connection.” ~ Brené Brown

Find the courage to be vulnerable and tell the story as you are, not as you think the other person might want to hear. And let’s not dismiss the era we are living in where being authentic and living in our truth is GOOD thing. There’s never been a better time in the history of the universe to be the real you. Remember who you are, you’re a high-value woman and no one can steal your value. Keep working on yourself—for you. You’ve got this, baby!

“Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.” ~ Dr. Seuss

Connect with me on Instagram for more food for thought and inspiration! @loveandliberation.co

Love,

Thena