An Observation on Gender Inequality in Leadership Approaches

I want to share a recent observation on gender equality amongst leaders in the workplace.

As a senior leader at a large organization, I appreciate the tremendous efforts on this topic. Some of these across the corporate landscape include hiring and paying women equally, assuring women are represented in senior leadership and ensuring the proper infrastructures for a woman to succeed.

What I have recently started to understand, however, is that while all of these things are very important, they are not enough. I believe one of the most significant things not yet addressed adequately is how some fundamental differences in personality traits between men and women manifest and are treated unequally in the workplace.

I acknowledge that many people in leadership positions tend to have a very definitive decisiveness to their personality; they're often called to action to make quick and complex decisions and, after years of that experience, are pretty accustomed to acting quickly, perhaps at times in a way that may lack all of the information and collaboration. I accept that. A strong persona within leaders is every day. I accept that. I find that leaders, men, and women alike, often exhibit these traits and, as a leader should, will take accountability for their decisions. But what I see as a critical difference in those situations is how a more aggressive demeanor is perceived and responded to. Too often, how decisions are made or just the general discourse from leaders can come in an aggressive manner that can be harsh, condescending, and uncomfortable to others. And while both men and women can exhibit this leadership trait, aggressiveness is perceived & treated quite differently between the two genders. When a man takes an aggressive and condescending approach, it's often validated, accepted, and praised as an upbeat, take-charge, effective leadership style; especially accepted by other men. Other men tolerate and get this as "locker room toughness" (as I have been told) and expect their female peers to grow a thicker skin. And too often, this continues to persist, as men continue to be rewarded and promoted for this behavior.

On the other hand, if a woman were to exhibit this aggressive, condescending leadership style, she would be seen as emotional and complex. She's not admired or validated for this behavior and is faulted for her inability to be kinder, gentler, and more inclusive. And in fact, she is criticized by both men and women for this. This scenario presents quite a challenge as this inequality of treatment makes it very difficult for women in leadership to effectively work with their male counterparts and truly get past a certain point, creating a glass ceiling.

In all this, I believe this type of aggressive, condescending leadership style shouldn't be accepted or rewarded for either gender. Again, I agree that I authentically understand that a collaborative approach is not always

possible. Often, leaders need to be definitive, decisive and will need to make complex and challenging decisions that all may not accept. But they also need to show thoughtfulness and respect for the people within their organizations, and this should be enforced for all leaders, both male and female, equally. In the case of an aggressive leader, in my opinion, no one should have to develop "thicker skin," but rather, a bold and condescending leadership style needs to be addressed and rectified.

Until we develop ways to help perceive and respond to leadership styles equally amongst men and women and equally reward and fault men and women, I believe we're still missing out on addressing an integral part of creating gender equality in the workplace. We need to promote an environment where women can get through a glass ceiling by feeling comfortable enough to be themselves and still be equally treated as leaders.

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